I Am a Fixer

wp-1365255523453Or at least I want to be.  My first impulse on seeing any problem is to fix it.

Got a knitting problem? I’ll fix it. Electricity doesn’t work right? I’ll fix it. (Note the lack of “call someone to” in front of that.) Someone is in relationship trouble? I’ll fix it. Sick kids? I’ll fix it.

I hate it when I can’t fix it. There are also plenty of times I really shouldn’t fix it. I can be so good as so many things, sometimes it’s hard to remember that I can’t be good at everything, nor do I need to, and it’s okay to let someone else fix it. Sometimes somebody wants to fix it themselves, and just wants me to tell them how, but if they don’t say that specifically, I just fix it first and then realize I shouldn’t have later. (This happens with knitting stuff a lot.)

Sometimes I try to fix it, but make it worse instead. That’s even harder than not being able to fix it at all, because then I want to fix what I broke, and I still want to fix the original problem, and then I feel bad for causing trouble and for not being able to fix it.

I have little sleep and a long day and weekend ahead, and now the word fix looks funny and has lost all meaning, so I should stop there.

Published by solinox

I am a Wiccan priestess, a libertarian mother of triplets plus three, a wife and homeschooling mom to blind and autistic children, a fiber artist, and a Jane of All Trades, always learning and seeking to help.

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