A friend of mine posted this blog this morning about the mommy wars. To sum up, the author points out that feelings of inadequacy tend to prompt tired, stressed moms to lash out against each other over trivial differences in lifestyle and parenting. She then goes on to lead with her Christian faith, reminding that Jesus accepts her as she is and loves her even when she is imperfect, and that she can walk away from the mommy wars with that strength behind her.
It got me thinking. Christians do have that default of “Jesus loves me” no matter what. In this, they find forgiveness for mistakes and acceptance of imperfection. In fact, sometimes it seems that Christianity revels in humanity’s imperfection, always stressing that only God and Jesus are perfect. I can see how this is a very helpful belief to have in daily life, a very useful belief for fighting perfectionism and feelings of failure.
What do we have? Christians certainly don’t have a lock on being perfectionists. How many of us feel the need for the perfect spell, the perfect ritual, the perfect and complete knowledge of All The Magickal Things? How many of us have allowed our spiritual practice to fall by the roadside, victim of our perfectionism, our feelings that if we can’t do it “right” all the time, we just shouldn’t bother? How many of us are actually afraid to attend festivals or public rituals, much less give our own workshops and perform our own rituals, afraid that we’re not doing it “right”, that our contribution is worthless if it doesn’t measure up to some standard?
How many of us are afraid that we will ruin our children if we don’t raise them absolutely right, spiritually or otherwise?
How do you fight your perfectionism within the framework of your pagan spirituality?